Wednesday, November 10, 2004

These Are the Kinds of Things We Say To Each Other (Volume One)


"These fridge packs aren't as easy to open as they used to be."

"I think they figured out that we like them, so they don't feel the need to make them as well anymore."

***

"I think you like the show because every woman on it is hot."

"No, I just like the show. The fact that every woman is smoking hot is a bonus."

"It's a pretty nice bonus."

***

"I just noticed my Halloween pumpkins are still up."

"I left my Christmas tree up last year until April."

***

"Remember Titus?"

"Yeah, my dad liked that show."

"I liked it too. I watched it."

"Really??"

***

"First Trapper John left and Henry died, to be replaced by BJ and Colonel Potter. Then Frank left, replaced by Winchester. Radar eventually left too."

"Fuck you."

***

"Why do you have all those keys?"

"I can name what almost all of them go to."

***

"I bought a desk set today for my office: stapler, scissors, tape dispenser, and paperclip holder."

"I bet the department would supply those for you if you asked."

"Mine are green."

***

"What are you typing?"

"That's my remote control again. It sounds like a lot of different things."

***

"You like to talk about the pocket of food he keeps on the side of his mouth while he's talking. You like to use the word pocket."

"I've also said pouch."

***

"Baby baby baby. Baby for baby."

"Boo boo boo. Baby for boo."